say goodbye to high school and say hi to the university ^ ^

kemarin aku dikejutkan oleh pengumuman dari akun resmi UI bahwa pengumuman hasil SIMAK UI yang seharusnya tanggal 29 Juli 2012 dipercepat menjadi hari ini (19 Juli 2012). jantungku serasa mau melompat keluar karena terkejut, nervous, tapi senang. karena itu memang harapanku. sebelumnya aku berdoa agar pengumumannya dipercepat sebelum batas akhir pendaftaran ulang UNJ (27 Juli 2012). karena sempat galau juga mau daftar ulang disana atau nunggu pengumuman SIMAK aja =-= alhamdulilah doaku dikabulkan. ga nyangka juga pengumumannya dipercepat sampai 10 hari o-o

tapi..hari ini aku dikecewakan dengan mengetahui bahwa pengumuman yang kutunggu tidak sesuai harapan. aku ga lulus :( rasanya kecewa banget..saat lihat di koran, mencari daftar nomor ujian peserta yang lulus. nomorku ga tertera disana :( tiba-tiba badan rasanya jadi lemes dan air mata tidak tertahan keluar =.=

tapi sekarang aku sadar..ikhlasin aja :] mungkin jalanku memang bukan disana. eventhough im stilll sad but im sure GOD know whats the best for me :)

fail today for succes tomorrow..because everyday is a second chance :)

sekarang fokus aja sama UNJ. mungkin disana emang jalanku. aku juga udah bersyukur banget waktu tes SNMPTN aku lulus dan diterima di UNJ jurusan sastra inggris. dari ribuan orang yang berminat untuk belajar disana..aku termasuk salah satu dari orang-orang yang beruntung diterima disana :>

lagipula disana juga banyak temen satu SMAnya :D dan aku udah dapet temen baru..satu fakultas tapi beda jurusan ^w^ jadi ga sabar pengen kuliah xD tapi katanya nanti kalau udah jadi mahasiswa akan lebih sibuk 3:

dan masih ada masalah untuk kuliah disana :" masalah jarak. lumayan jauh juga dari rumah =.= tapi gapapa lah. harus tetap semangat~! :}

tanggal 24 nanti ada wawancara. sebenernya bukan tes sih. tapi wawancara buat pendataan aja oleh kakak kelas :) kecuali kalau yang diterima lewat jalur PENMABA..mereka masih ada tes wawancara lagi. semangat ya buat temen-temenku yang lagi nunggu pengumuman universitas yang dituju. goodluck and keep spirit \^o^/

past, future, and present.

the past is behind..learn from it. the future is ahead..prepare for it. the present is here..live it. agree with those sentences ? ^ ^

past..sangat banyak kenangan disana. memories..tidak pernah bisa dilupakan. sangat banyak orang yang selalu teringat ke masa lalu, stuck with it. without they realize that we're not life for the past. but for the future. termasuk aku. aku ingat bagaimana dulu aku patah hati karena seseorang..saat dia meninggalkan ku untuk selama-lamanya dari dunia ini..it's so sad and so hard to move on. meskipun banyak teman yang menghiburku dan berkali-kali mereka bilang "you're not alone..we're here with you" .. but i still feel lonely..dan satu-satunya yang bisa kulakukan adalah -smile and say that "im ok"-. nobody knows the hurt and the pain that i keep inside.

satu tahun berlalu. i thought that i was survived from my broken heart but im wrong. saat itu aku sudah bisa tertawa lagi dengan teman-teman tapi terkadang saat sedang sendiri..aku teringat lagi dan menangis saat tidak ada orang yang tau. akibatnya nilai-nilaiku dikelas menurun drastis..then i feel like i have mistakes so much with my parents because of it :(

sekarang aku sadar kalau aku sangat bodoh. tidak ada gunanya meratapi masa lalu yang tidak bisa kembali. mungkin saat ini aku sudah benar-benar sembuh dari sakit hati masa lalu itu. entahlah~ sekarang yang terpenting adalah aku ingin menggapai cita-cita ku, membahagiakan kedua orang tuaku dan membuktikan ke semuanya bahwa aku bisa !

future..we live for it. present..we live in it. lets do the best. must do the best. to reach the best future (:

my biggest dream :]

mom&dad, they’re the best people in my life. they’re the most important people for me. they’re always on my side, care with me, protect me, love me, no matter what. yesterday suddenly i feel like want to cry when i see their face. i realized how much they love me. they’re always support me to reach my dreams :’) and the thing that make me want to cry is bcz i fear..i fear how if i fail to reach my dreams ? will i see their dissapointed face ? i dun want :’( now my biggest dream is..i want to make them always happy. i promise. god..please help me :’)

old diary.

"time is priceless. u can't own it but u can use it. u can't keep it but u can send it. once u've lost it .. u can never get it back."

yesterday i was accidentally found my old diary. wew too long i didnt see that > <"
i read again all that i've wrote on there. thats made me realized that -time flies so fast- :'3
until now i experienced and learned so many things in my life. sad time..hard time..happy time..i passed it all. thats the things that make me in here now :]

suddenly i feel like something is missing. the things in the past that not in here now. but like what u all knew..we cant turn back the time..life must go on. now just looking forward to the future..a better future :)

change.

"everyone changes..u cant expect someone to stay the same forever..u cant grow that way."

everything has changed ..

in life..thats normal rite ?

just like the sentences above

for me, 'change' word is cruel

thats when love change to be hate

thats when a lover change to be a hater

thats when someone that really close to u change to be a stranger

thats cruel. rite ?

i hate it

well, it's depends on the situation

not everything is change from good to be bad

sometimes bad things change to be good things :]

and change to be better is a must !

but have u ever felt like ur bestfriends changed ?

have u ever cried because of that ?

i have

and then i'll ask to my self, have i ever did anything wrong to them ?

if yes .. im sorry

but thats so hurt when they're changed when u even didnt do anything wrong to them

just suddenly change... wuuush and friendship didnt same like before again

why like that ? why ?! :(

dear bestfriends .. why r u changed ?

why now u act like we're strangers ?

what did i do wrong with u ?

i miss that time ..

the time when we're laugh together, joke together

share story to each other

and etc

i miss that time !

but i cant turn back the time

a true friend will never leave u alone

i need true friends..friends that will never leave me alone
eventhough time always change and go on ..

i just dun want to be alone

my plan ^w^

ANNYEONGHASEYO~! xD

pufff..finally i can appear again in here after dissapeared for a long time 0---------0
i was busy with my study ne~ i must focus with it. that time i decided to not online in here before my exam finish. now im in here, so it's mean i've done with my exam and imma FREE now. yeay~! xD

it's time for refreshing my mind after dizzy because of the exam @_@ lol

now i've a long holiday. really a long holiday *-*

im confused about what to do in this long holiday~ :3 actually thats not because i dunno what to do but thats because i've so many things that i want to do so im confused. HHAHA 0-0

i wanna hang out with friends. nowadays many friends that ask me to hang out but i cant >.< because i dun have much money now T^T parents not yet give me money =____=

but i decide that i'll not waste my free time. i just want to do something usefull ^ ^

erm..i think i'll write a new novel > < but i dun have any inspiration for the new story now =.=

my first novel even not yet published. i wanna try to bring it to the book publisher. i hope they want to accept it and help me to publish it. hhehe

oh and im planning to do part time work to during my holiday @@ i wanna try to work and get money by my self. i dun want if everything always depends on parents. im searching it now. my uncle said he'll help me to search it *excited* :D

beside that, ofc i must still study hard for the entrance exam to come in university ^ ^

the list of the university that i want is :
1. UI ( Universitas Indonesia / University of Indonesia ) or
2. UNJ ( Universitas Negeri Jakarta / State University of Jakarta )

i hope i can pass it. eventhough it's kinda hard because so many people that want to pass that university too. but i wont give up >__________<

i want to choose major english literature because i really interested with it ^ ^ however..english language is the number one of international language ne. it's important to improve my english. and i think it's really match with my passion :)

now im in the middle of senior high school student and college student. im waiting for my graduating ^o^
also waiting the result of the national exam. i'll know it about next month ne~ i hope i can pass that exam succesfully. my future is depends on that exam. help me YaAllah :')

i've tried my best for it, now what can i do is just pray :]

i must try harder and harder to reach my dreams. i want to make my parents proud of me. so go go go hwaiting for my self~! :'D

uhm...

actually i still have many things that i want to tell in here but my fingers ady tired to typing now. lol. so SEE YA LATER readers~! paipai ^ ^/

for my saengi..hee young :)

annyeong saengi..still remember me ? long time didnt talk ne..i hope u'll never forget me and dun ever think that im forget u. im never forget u..im just busy with my study now .. =,=

i wont and cant often online anm..we cant chat everyday like before again ne. i miss ya and i miss all skull family's members also :( u know what ? im always hope everything will be like before again..our oppa come back on fb and skull familly can be so close like before again >.< but it's impossible ne ? it's have been more than one year since our oppa gone T^T im so sad everytime i remember skull familly..bcoz i miss them so much.

i still can chat w/ jasmine..hani unnie and etc but so seldom..i think they're so busy now..me too =.=

i miss yuki~! u know her rite ? she ever said that she'll back but until now is not. i miss kelly and viky also~! viky..i thought she forgot me already..she removed me from her friendlist in fb. i dunno why T^T

ok..now skull family is different *sigh*

erm..i just wanna say dun forget me and take care always :)

p/s : if u read this..just leave ur comment in this post~ ^o^/

my first novel~! :D

im soooooooooooooo happy~ finally the novel which i wrote ady the end~! >O< *claps* fufu~
it's my first novel >_<

the tittle of my novel is 'Crying Soul'. it's about two people who's love each other but cant be together..well that's a sad story. urmmm actually the story of that novel is mine..it's almost same with my love story..hhehe

i love writing..i really love writing. it's my dream to be a famous writer~i hope that my dream will be come true~ although i know im still must learn for that~ ganbatte~! >.<

SHINee - The Name I Loved.

 

ROMAJI

soni siryeowa sarangui gieogi chagapge dagawa

aryeoonda ijeneun deo isang neoreul bujeonghago sipji anheun nareul algo itjiman

gakkai inneun neol saranghal su eomneungeol algo itgie

nal barabol su eomneun neol gidarimi neomu himdeureo

ijen gyeondil su eobseo irwojil su eopgie

naega saranghaetdeon geu ireum

bulleoboryeo nagalsurok neomu meoreojyeotdeon

geu ireum ijen jeogeonoko na ulmeogyeo

nae ane sumgo sipeojyeo

neol saranghal subakke eobseotdeon

geu nareul ijen arajwoyo

irul su eomneun sarangdo saranginikka

honja hal su eomneun sarangiran neukkimeun naege dagawa

sijak hal su do eomneun geuriumdeureun keojyeoman gago

sirin gaseum han kyeonen neoui hyanggiman nama

naega saranghaetdeon geu ireum

bulleoboryeo nagalsurok neomu meoreojyeotdeon

geu ireum ijen jeogeonoko na ulmeogyeo

nae ane sumgo sipeojyeo

neol saranghal subakke eobseotdeo

geu nareul ijen arajwoyo

irul su eomneun sarangdo saranginikka

sucheon beoneul dorikyeo cheoeumui naro gan sungane

gaseum han guseoge da asagal ne moseubin geol

naega saranghaetdeon geu ireum

bulleoboryeo nagalsurok neomu meoreojyeotdeon

geu ireum ijen jeogeonoko na ulmeogyeo

nae ane sumgo sipeojyeo

neol saranghal subakke eobseotdeon

geu nareul ijen arajwoyo

irul su eomneun sarangdo saranginikka

irul su eomneun sarangdo saranginikka

 TRANSLATION

both hands trembles as i remembered the cold love memories

now it is getting weirder, i dont wish to reject you, but i just know that

no matter how close we are, i know that i cant love you anymore

i cant miss you; waiting for you makes me tired

i cant endure anymore and i cant realize this

the name i loved once in this life

has becoming further and further away from me

i am writing your name on a paper and forever kept it in my heart

from that day i only realized that i will only loved you forever

love that cant be together can also be known as love

i cant handle the love memories and feelings alone

i cant start this, i can only miss you secretly in my heart

my heart only left your body fragrance that i missed and always loved

the name i loved once in this life

has becoming further and further away from me

i am writing your name on a paper and forever kept it in my heart

from that day i only realized that i will only loved you forever

love that cant be together can also be known as love

kept remembering the first time i saw you walking towards me

and stolen an edge of my heart without noticing

the name i loved once in this life (loved once in this life)

has becoming further and further away from me

i am writing your name on a paper and forever kept it in my heart

from that day i only realized that i will only loved you forever

eventhough it is not long, but my love for you will never change

 the name i loved once in this life

has becoming further and further away from me

i am writing your name on a paper and forever kept it in my heart

from that day i only realized that i will only loved you forever

like a star.

made this poem for ranmaru :)

..

he's like a star ..
can shine brightly on the sky ..
make the nite sky being beautiful with his soft shine ..
and accompany me everytime im sad or feel alone ..
because everytime i see the stars i feel calm ..
and make me realize that my life will be so dark without stars ..
the stars never go anywhere ..
always in the sky .. always in my heart ..
eventhough sometimes the stars didn't appear on the sky but i know he always there ..
because maybe he's hide behind the cloud ..
just like a star .. he's so far from here ..
even if i try to run to catch him .. but i still can't catch him ..

maybe me and him just can be together in dream ..

:')

..