new beginning :)

if love has forgotten ..

this is a lyrics of an old song. soundtrack of an old drama titled "snow angel". do u still remember ?
i love that drama so much. it's the first asian drama that make me cry when i watch it. hhehe~
it's so sad -_- even the song and the means of this song.
now i just want to share the translation of the lyrics.
hmm why suddenly i want to share this song ?
maybe because this song is the song of my heart rite now. hhaha :')
for someone..i wanna ask. is it forgotten already ? i mean the love.
for me it's so hard.
am i still hoping for u to come back ? maybe yes ..
but dun worry. im not expect too much. i won't. 

well..i think the prolog from me (?) is enough. hhaha and this is the lyrics :)

"If Love Has Forgotten"

There are always some things we couldn’t say in time

There is always this one person who leaves a trace in your life

I remember those flowers, those naivety, and tears just fell

I only have one thing to ask, are you doing well right now?

If love has forgotten, tears refuse to fall

Those happiness, let her fulfil them in my place

If love has understood the price of promises

What you can’t give me, please give her the full share

There are always some things we can’t let go, becoming old scars

The more you refuse to face it, the more it hurts  

I think of your face, your hair, no I won’t be afraid 

Just let time answer it for us  

If love has forgotten, tears refuse to fall

Those happiness, let her fulfil them in my place 

If love has understood the price of promises

What you can’t give me, please give her the full share

I said I’ve forgotten, that it doesn’t hurt anymore  

That’s only because I’ve loved too deep and knew all too well

I smiled and forgave, it’s worth it if I’m doing it for you

Show me with your happiness that it’s the right decision to let go of my hands now  

Don’t worry about me being reluctant to so 

If love has forgotten, then let him go

Those happiness, let her fulfil them in my place 

If love has understood the price of promises

What you can’t give me, please give her the full share

If love has forgotten, do you still remember?

..

SILAS DANE.

aloha~ ^-^

kali ini aku mau bercerita tentang seorang tokoh dari sebuah novel. why ? because i do really admire him *-*
sebenernya dia bukan tokoh utama dalam novel ini..malah bisa dibilang dia adalah musuh dari sang tokoh utama (awalnya gitu) tapi seiiring berjalannya cerita..terungkaplah sifat asli tokoh ini. ternyata dia ga jahat dan ternyata dugaanku tepat >-< entah kenapa dari awal baca tentang dia di novel ini (ga awal-awal banget sih) aku ngerasa kalo dia itu baik walaupun di novel diceritakan dia adalah tokoh yang jahat tapi ada sesuatu dalam dirinya yang membuatku merasa kalo dia itu baik hhehe :3

ok. pasti kalian semua udah penasaran kan siapa tokoh itu ?

dia adalah :

"SILAS DANE"

(kira-kira seperti inilah dia. serem ya~ tapi keren >-<)

di novel dia diceritakan sebagai sosok yang hebat dan memiliki kemampuan yang luar biasa dalam bertarung. dia tidak dapat mati karena sebenarnya dia memang sudah mati namun hidup (maaf kalo kalian pusing dengan penjelasannya. hhaha). jika terluka..lukanya akan segera pulih kembali dengan cepat. karena dia memang tidak sama dengan manusia biasa. dia unik. dia tidak takut apapun dan semua orang takut dengannya kecuali satu orang bernama Da'Ru. Da'Ru lah yang membuatnya menjadi seperti itu. dengan eksperimen melalui selubung arwah yang dilakukan Da'ru..jiwa Silas menjadi terkurung antara kehidupan dan kematian. Da'Ru membuatnya seperti itu untuk diperalat dan sebagai eksperimennya. Da'ru membuat Silas terikat dengan dirinya sehingga sehebat apapun Silas..Silas tidak bisa melawannya. Silas tidak takut dengan Da'Ru. dia marah dan benci pada Da'Ru karena membuatnya begitu. tapi Silas tidak bisa melakukan apapun. dia hanya bisa menuruti kehendak Da'Ru dan menunggu sampai waktu yang tepat untuk balas dendam karena sebelumnya Da'Ru telah membohonginya bahwa jika Da'Ru mati..Silas juga akan ikut mati (karena darah mereka sudah terikat). namun seperti yang sudah diketahui..Silas tidak dapat mati..jika Da'Ru mati jiwa atau roh Silas akan -selamanya- terperangkap antara kehidupan dan kematian tanpa raga karena kematian tidak menginginkannya :3

hingga suatu hari dia berhasil menemukan Kate (Sang Tokoh Utama). Kate adalah salah satu dari orang-orang berkemampuan. di novel ini orang berkemampuan diceritakan sebagai orang yang mampu melihat ke selubung kematian..mengetahui apa yang telah dan akan terjadi..dapat menyembuhkan luka dan bahkan menghidupkan kembali orang yang sudah meninggal. Silas mencari Kate atas suruhan Da'Ru namun ternyata Silas juga mempunyai tujuan sendiri untuk mencari Kate yaitu : "membantunya untuk mati". Silas ingin mati. ternyata dibalik penampilannya yang kuat dan dingin..dia merasa menderita hidup seperti itu. dia sudah muak dengan Da'Ru.

erm..singkat cerita aja deh ya :p di akhir cerita akhirnya Silas dan Kate berhasil mengalahkan Da'Ru. walaupun tujuan utama Silas yaitu -mati- tidak tercapai..tapi setidaknya dia berhasil bebas dari Da'Ru dan berhasil balas dendam padanya (y). ohya mereka ga cuma berdua. ada Edgar (sahabat Kate) dan Artemis (paman Kate). juga burung gagak peliharaan Silas. ah burung gagak ini bukan cuma peliharaan bagi Silas tapi juga merupakan sahabat dan satu-satunya keluarga yang dia miliki. Silas sayang banget sama burung gagak itu. Burung gagak itu sempet mati dibunuh sama Da'Ru tapi dihidupkan kembali oleh Kate \^-^/

dan alhamdullilah ceritanya happy ending. hhaha soalnya aku selalu sedih kalo baca novel yang akhirnya sedih :\

pokoknya harus diakui kalo Silas itu adalah tokoh yang keren. bukan dari segi fisik tapi dari segi sikap dan kemampuan (y) ;)

nah sekian dulu ya..ohya novelnya berjudul "Wintercraft" :D kalo kalian penasaran..coba baca ya. seru kok ^-^

just some words from me :)

hello readers..long time no post anything in here ya..sorry i've been busy lately :')
how r u all ? i hope u all fine..im also fine in here and always trying to be fine. but well..life is not always have a good times. sometimes there's have a bad times. just like a roller coaster~ hhehe :)

just keep smile and think positive. that's a key to the happiness. but sometimes in the sad time..we just cant hold our tears anymore and the tears fall down .. not because we're weak..but because we're a human. and when u see someone smiles all the times..it's doesnt mean their life is perfect..u just dunno what they keep inside. just crying alone..maybe faking a smile.

but lets just enjoy ur life and always be thankful for what u have in ur life.
and when u feel sad..lonely..or u feel like nobody's care about u..lets remember that GOD always with u and will never leave u alone :)

everything is happens for a reason. just do the best and wait the rite time. because everything will be beautiful in the rite time (y)

:')

when i walked besides u ..
my heart keeps trembling the whole day through ..
alone..thinking about u
always keeping memories u marked

even if we accidently meet each other
i will seemingly looking down
even when u and i surprisingly meet
i'll only know to expose a shy little smile

do u understand it now ?
do u see through my heart now ?
the love that comes silently ..
did u..did u hear it now ?

it was my love since the beginning
that warmly shines on my icy heart
the love that comes to me step by step
although i'm a bit afraid ..

the one that moved me..my love
just like the rain..disrupted my heart
my heart..my heart is already in love
missing you so ..

do u understand it now ?
do u see through my heart now ?
the love that comes silently
did you..did you hear it now ?

it was my love since the beginning
that warmly shines on my icy heart
the love that comes to me step by step
although i'm a bit afraid ..

the one that moved me..my love
just like the rain..disrupted my heart
my heart..my heart is already in love
missing you so ..

this should be love ..

(It's Love - Taeyeon&Sunny)

..

standing in the glowing red sunny spot..the silent breeze wraps around us
walking in step on the road..im always chasing after u
to stumble and fall..and to cry
i've decided to live well..its not me. but look..because u've let go of my hand
even my fearful heart has become strong

therefore ..
just cry and laugh. this hand that was held is a promise in the many words that can't be lost
in the glowing sky of when we met..look i am still wishing for the same things as then
time is always like the scattering leaves. ur hand is slipping away while i'm not noticing ..
one by one..the seasons pass
but after.. how many of my thoughts reached u ?
i cant even bring back the normal everydays
all those days and all those moments feel so dear ..

therefore ..
tears and smiles and this hand that was held. memories in the many photos that can't be lost .. in the glowing sky of when we met..look im still making the same vows as then
before long we'll have to reach our 'farewell' and everything about us will end ?
the 'place we met' and the 'place we are now' will be close to my heart forever ..
look..if we look back..the footprints continue on ..

therefore ..
just cry and laugh. this hand that was held..don't let go of it until the last moment
before this road..together again
lets walk..lets walk

therefore ..
just cry and laugh..this hand that was held is a promise in all the words that can't be lost
in the glowing sky of when we met..look im still wishing for the same things as then ..

(Akaneiro no Yakusoku - Ikimono Gakari)

welcome u (:

hey u..we're met by a chance that god gave to us

before..im never thought that we'll be like this

u know that u're my first in real

now i give my heart to u ..

maybe it's still too early to call this feeling is love

but just let this feeling grow up day by day ok ? :)

i dun need a perfect person

i just need a perfect love ..

i dun need a perfect life

i just need a happy life ..

dun just say many sweet words to me

i want u to prove it :)

 

now take my hand and dun ever let me go ..

 can u ?

future ..

no one know about that

maybe then u'll love me more or maybe then u'll love me less

maybe then we'll always together or maybe then we'll separate in two

but lets we try our best to keep this feeling

u'll take care of me rite ?

i believe in u :)

i put my hope on u

dun make me dissapointed

dun hurt my heart

..

 promise ?

  thanks for come into my life <3

welcome to my life

welcome to my heart

welcome u

..

Fahmi Alfian Haki (:

say goodbye to high school and say hi to the university ^ ^

kemarin aku dikejutkan oleh pengumuman dari akun resmi UI bahwa pengumuman hasil SIMAK UI yang seharusnya tanggal 29 Juli 2012 dipercepat menjadi hari ini (19 Juli 2012). jantungku serasa mau melompat keluar karena terkejut, nervous, tapi senang. karena itu memang harapanku. sebelumnya aku berdoa agar pengumumannya dipercepat sebelum batas akhir pendaftaran ulang UNJ (27 Juli 2012). karena sempat galau juga mau daftar ulang disana atau nunggu pengumuman SIMAK aja =-= alhamdulilah doaku dikabulkan. ga nyangka juga pengumumannya dipercepat sampai 10 hari o-o

tapi..hari ini aku dikecewakan dengan mengetahui bahwa pengumuman yang kutunggu tidak sesuai harapan. aku ga lulus :( rasanya kecewa banget..saat lihat di koran, mencari daftar nomor ujian peserta yang lulus. nomorku ga tertera disana :( tiba-tiba badan rasanya jadi lemes dan air mata tidak tertahan keluar =.=

tapi sekarang aku sadar..ikhlasin aja :] mungkin jalanku memang bukan disana. eventhough im stilll sad but im sure GOD know whats the best for me :)

fail today for succes tomorrow..because everyday is a second chance :)

sekarang fokus aja sama UNJ. mungkin disana emang jalanku. aku juga udah bersyukur banget waktu tes SNMPTN aku lulus dan diterima di UNJ jurusan sastra inggris. dari ribuan orang yang berminat untuk belajar disana..aku termasuk salah satu dari orang-orang yang beruntung diterima disana :>

lagipula disana juga banyak temen satu SMAnya :D dan aku udah dapet temen baru..satu fakultas tapi beda jurusan ^w^ jadi ga sabar pengen kuliah xD tapi katanya nanti kalau udah jadi mahasiswa akan lebih sibuk 3:

dan masih ada masalah untuk kuliah disana :" masalah jarak. lumayan jauh juga dari rumah =.= tapi gapapa lah. harus tetap semangat~! :}

tanggal 24 nanti ada wawancara. sebenernya bukan tes sih. tapi wawancara buat pendataan aja oleh kakak kelas :) kecuali kalau yang diterima lewat jalur PENMABA..mereka masih ada tes wawancara lagi. semangat ya buat temen-temenku yang lagi nunggu pengumuman universitas yang dituju. goodluck and keep spirit \^o^/

past, future, and present.

the past is behind..learn from it. the future is ahead..prepare for it. the present is here..live it. agree with those sentences ? ^ ^

past..sangat banyak kenangan disana. memories..tidak pernah bisa dilupakan. sangat banyak orang yang selalu teringat ke masa lalu, stuck with it. without they realize that we're not life for the past. but for the future. termasuk aku. aku ingat bagaimana dulu aku patah hati karena seseorang..saat dia meninggalkan ku untuk selama-lamanya dari dunia ini..it's so sad and so hard to move on. meskipun banyak teman yang menghiburku dan berkali-kali mereka bilang "you're not alone..we're here with you" .. but i still feel lonely..dan satu-satunya yang bisa kulakukan adalah -smile and say that "im ok"-. nobody knows the hurt and the pain that i keep inside.

satu tahun berlalu. i thought that i was survived from my broken heart but im wrong. saat itu aku sudah bisa tertawa lagi dengan teman-teman tapi terkadang saat sedang sendiri..aku teringat lagi dan menangis saat tidak ada orang yang tau. akibatnya nilai-nilaiku dikelas menurun drastis..then i feel like i have mistakes so much with my parents because of it :(

sekarang aku sadar kalau aku sangat bodoh. tidak ada gunanya meratapi masa lalu yang tidak bisa kembali. mungkin saat ini aku sudah benar-benar sembuh dari sakit hati masa lalu itu. entahlah~ sekarang yang terpenting adalah aku ingin menggapai cita-cita ku, membahagiakan kedua orang tuaku dan membuktikan ke semuanya bahwa aku bisa !

future..we live for it. present..we live in it. lets do the best. must do the best. to reach the best future (:

my biggest dream :]

mom&dad, they’re the best people in my life. they’re the most important people for me. they’re always on my side, care with me, protect me, love me, no matter what. yesterday suddenly i feel like want to cry when i see their face. i realized how much they love me. they’re always support me to reach my dreams :’) and the thing that make me want to cry is bcz i fear..i fear how if i fail to reach my dreams ? will i see their dissapointed face ? i dun want :’( now my biggest dream is..i want to make them always happy. i promise. god..please help me :’)

old diary.

"time is priceless. u can't own it but u can use it. u can't keep it but u can send it. once u've lost it .. u can never get it back."

yesterday i was accidentally found my old diary. wew too long i didnt see that > <"
i read again all that i've wrote on there. thats made me realized that -time flies so fast- :'3
until now i experienced and learned so many things in my life. sad time..hard time..happy time..i passed it all. thats the things that make me in here now :]

suddenly i feel like something is missing. the things in the past that not in here now. but like what u all knew..we cant turn back the time..life must go on. now just looking forward to the future..a better future :)

change.

"everyone changes..u cant expect someone to stay the same forever..u cant grow that way."

everything has changed ..

in life..thats normal rite ?

just like the sentences above

for me, 'change' word is cruel

thats when love change to be hate

thats when a lover change to be a hater

thats when someone that really close to u change to be a stranger

thats cruel. rite ?

i hate it

well, it's depends on the situation

not everything is change from good to be bad

sometimes bad things change to be good things :]

and change to be better is a must !

but have u ever felt like ur bestfriends changed ?

have u ever cried because of that ?

i have

and then i'll ask to my self, have i ever did anything wrong to them ?

if yes .. im sorry

but thats so hurt when they're changed when u even didnt do anything wrong to them

just suddenly change... wuuush and friendship didnt same like before again

why like that ? why ?! :(

dear bestfriends .. why r u changed ?

why now u act like we're strangers ?

what did i do wrong with u ?

i miss that time ..

the time when we're laugh together, joke together

share story to each other

and etc

i miss that time !

but i cant turn back the time

a true friend will never leave u alone

i need true friends..friends that will never leave me alone
eventhough time always change and go on ..

i just dun want to be alone

my plan ^w^

ANNYEONGHASEYO~! xD

pufff..finally i can appear again in here after dissapeared for a long time 0---------0
i was busy with my study ne~ i must focus with it. that time i decided to not online in here before my exam finish. now im in here, so it's mean i've done with my exam and imma FREE now. yeay~! xD

it's time for refreshing my mind after dizzy because of the exam @_@ lol

now i've a long holiday. really a long holiday *-*

im confused about what to do in this long holiday~ :3 actually thats not because i dunno what to do but thats because i've so many things that i want to do so im confused. HHAHA 0-0

i wanna hang out with friends. nowadays many friends that ask me to hang out but i cant >.< because i dun have much money now T^T parents not yet give me money =____=

but i decide that i'll not waste my free time. i just want to do something usefull ^ ^

erm..i think i'll write a new novel > < but i dun have any inspiration for the new story now =.=

my first novel even not yet published. i wanna try to bring it to the book publisher. i hope they want to accept it and help me to publish it. hhehe

oh and im planning to do part time work to during my holiday @@ i wanna try to work and get money by my self. i dun want if everything always depends on parents. im searching it now. my uncle said he'll help me to search it *excited* :D

beside that, ofc i must still study hard for the entrance exam to come in university ^ ^

the list of the university that i want is :
1. UI ( Universitas Indonesia / University of Indonesia ) or
2. UNJ ( Universitas Negeri Jakarta / State University of Jakarta )

i hope i can pass it. eventhough it's kinda hard because so many people that want to pass that university too. but i wont give up >__________<

i want to choose major english literature because i really interested with it ^ ^ however..english language is the number one of international language ne. it's important to improve my english. and i think it's really match with my passion :)

now im in the middle of senior high school student and college student. im waiting for my graduating ^o^
also waiting the result of the national exam. i'll know it about next month ne~ i hope i can pass that exam succesfully. my future is depends on that exam. help me YaAllah :')

i've tried my best for it, now what can i do is just pray :]

i must try harder and harder to reach my dreams. i want to make my parents proud of me. so go go go hwaiting for my self~! :'D

uhm...

actually i still have many things that i want to tell in here but my fingers ady tired to typing now. lol. so SEE YA LATER readers~! paipai ^ ^/

for my saengi..hee young :)

annyeong saengi..still remember me ? long time didnt talk ne..i hope u'll never forget me and dun ever think that im forget u. im never forget u..im just busy with my study now .. =,=

i wont and cant often online anm..we cant chat everyday like before again ne. i miss ya and i miss all skull family's members also :( u know what ? im always hope everything will be like before again..our oppa come back on fb and skull familly can be so close like before again >.< but it's impossible ne ? it's have been more than one year since our oppa gone T^T im so sad everytime i remember skull familly..bcoz i miss them so much.

i still can chat w/ jasmine..hani unnie and etc but so seldom..i think they're so busy now..me too =.=

i miss yuki~! u know her rite ? she ever said that she'll back but until now is not. i miss kelly and viky also~! viky..i thought she forgot me already..she removed me from her friendlist in fb. i dunno why T^T

ok..now skull family is different *sigh*

erm..i just wanna say dun forget me and take care always :)

p/s : if u read this..just leave ur comment in this post~ ^o^/